“And now abide faith, hope, love, these three, but the greatest
of these is love.”
1 Corinthians 13:13
Have you ever been angry or disappointed at someone—a loved one
for not doing something to the fullest of their ability- or the way you would
have done it? Have you ever judged a loved one based on their performance? It
could be a friend… child… parent… or spouse…
I have to admit God has recently revealed to me the pain I have
caused a loved one by my judgmental mindset. You want to know how God opened my
eyes to this revelation—He allowed someone else—someone I hold to the dearest
depths of my own heart to make judgments about my own person, abilities, and
question who I really am. Ouch…
I cannot remember a time I have been so hurt and lost, to say
the least. However, I didn’t dwell in this state of confusion for long at all.
Through similar experiences in the past, I have learned the quicker I get on my
face and give my ‘feelings’ to The Lord, the quicker I can see the big picture
and what The Lord may be trying to teach me through someone else’s hurtful
thoughts toward me. In this case it was realizing I had been basing the
‘importance’ of another relationship on the other person’s behavior and efforts
or lack thereof, toward me. These thoughts eventually manifested their way into
words, words that will probably burn in my mind for years to come just as they
will in my ‘victim’s’ mind.
As a Christian—If we are supposed to ‘Love as Christ loves the
Church’… then where do we have the right to pass horrible judgments to another
fellow Christian? So much so— that you are allowing the devil to poison your
thoughts, polluting them in a spiral of confusion. You begin re-thinking your
entire existence and past choices to love and stand by this person… Stop.
Our love for one another whether it be a child, parent, friend
or most importantly… our spouses… should never be based on their performance.
Our love should never be based on what they can and choose to give us or do for
us… or how often they can make us happy. This sort of ‘checklist’ if you
will—is very shallow to say the least.
What if that was how our Savior chose to love us? What if it was
a ‘religious’ love? Every day having to wake up to a daily checklist of things
to do to keep God’s love and for Him not to leave us and to continue to be
pleased with us? How exhausting would that be? We could never do it. We would
never be able to compete and keep God’s perfect love for us. So why do we hold
our loved ones to standards like this? Why so often does our love wavier and
revolve around how someone ‘performed’ that day or the last few weeks. What if
God woke us up one day and said—
“You’re out of chances, you should have washed your sink full of
dishes, you should have remembered to take the garbage out, you should have
done more for me, you shouldn’t have gotten angry, you shouldn’t have raised
your voice in this conversation, you shouldn’t have done this, you shouldn’t
have done that—I am disappointed in my relationship with you so I’m throwing
you away… you’re just too messed up and too difficult for me to keep my
commitments and promises to you.”
We love… because God first loved us. He has shown us mercy,
kindness, and immeasurable grace. So shouldn’t we pour out this kind of
love to those around us?
What if God left us because of our imperfect attitudes and
actions? We can’t fathom this thought, or at least I can’t. So why
are we so prone to and tempted to give up on our loved ones when they reveal
they are indeed human…? Why is it so easy for us to allow the devil to find a
place in our minds and make a mountain out of a molehill?
My fellow Jesus lovers—We don’t have time to allow the enemy to
slither into our minds and hearts to such extremities that we cause division in
our homes, families and churches.
Love covers a multitude of sins. Love is a commitment to the
fullest. It is a choice you make every day of your life. Choose love.
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not
boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not
easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but
rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes,
always perseveres. Love NEVER fails.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-8
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